Roooooooaaaaaaadddddd Trip: Destination KC

Sorry....I apparently really suck at this work/life balance thing.(translation: I have no time to blog, but will start making time to blog)

So....we took an impromptu road trip up to Kansas City over Labor Day weekend.

Before we get started, I would like to add a disclaimer/info/theory on road trips.  My theory is(used to be) pee before you leave, get in the car, drive, no stopping until you need fuel.  Fuel = bathroom break.  Pee/poop then or wait for the next tank to run out.  Stopping delays your ETA, ETA is the goal, the goal is to get from point A to Point B in the quickest time(safety taken into consideration, of course).

So here we go: Destination KC.  We all met in Denton near my new job site, I left my car at a hotel(this story to follow), C had the kids all strapped in, gear was loaded, car was fueled....boom let's do this.  Dallas to KC is roughly a 7 1/2 hour drive.  Since the kiddos eat every 4 hours, we tried to time it where we would only have to do one auto feeding.  The first few of hours were great.  C would sit and the back and do a little entertaining from time to time, but they seemed to be fine.  Around hour four the fuel level is lowering, we are approaching feeding, and they're getting a little squirmy.  Fine, I'll stop.  But let's make this quick.  I'll fuel, C makes the bottles, we'll feed, change diapers, and get on it.  WRONG. WRONG.WRONG.

I fuel up the car, go inside to get a snack, come out ready to get on it.  C has Tyler out of the car seat ready to change him(he's facing her), I look at him and see one thing...Shit.  A lot of it, populating a very large portion of his thigh.  It looks like there is more poo out of the diaper than in the diaper.  I tell C to freeze, because it is within one Tyler bounce of going from his thigh, to the back of his calf, to her jeans.  So I get the changing pad out, put on my imaginary Haz-Mat uniform. And go to town.  I was wrong, there was way more poo in the diaper than outside of the diaper, this thing was loaded.  Not to mention he has become the wiggle monster when changing him, add that to changing him in the front seat of a car, add that to the seat slants backwards...there was poo everywhere.  On me, on him, on the seat, on the cup holder...everywhere.

Next up Addison.  I could literally copy the entire paragraph from above, switch Adddison for Tyler, She for he, her for him...you get the idea. Let's all say it together.  There was poo everywhere.  Just two massive diaper bombs at a really bad time.

So..fuel stop is done.  Lets get on it.

Hours 4, 5 and 6 drag along...at this point we are basically giving the kids any thing they are allowed to put in there mouths to get some quiet time.

Here they are seen eating MumMums.  They are advertised(by me) as banana flavored cardboard textured crackers that dissolve in your mouth with the help of some chewing.  Yes, I'm still adhering to my rule,  taste anything you feed your kids. I can tell you these things taste exactly as advertised.  Banana flavored dissolving cardboard.  

To make a long road trip story even a longer road trip story...we finally made it.  A shade later than our ETA, a shade past babies eating time...but we only stopped once.   

Next blog will be soon(hopefully tomorrow).  It will be about the time in KC, the trip home and I can guarantee you it will have the following words in it: diarrhea and bird poop. 

Long Time, No Blog

Lots of change going on around the Eagle house, which has led to the lag in blogging...my apologies to my three readers. I got a new job, one that actually requires me to work, so I can't do much day blogging. But here's what's going on.

It's been so long since I've blogged both the kids started growing facial hair...

OK...not really that long, but given the hairy nature of our family it won't be long before Addison will be shaving her legs and Tyler will be shaving his face, back, chest, butt, ears and nostrils.

They bambinos turned 6 months old last week, and in a blink of an eye, half a year has passed.  Tyler is extremely mobile and has earned the name of Captain Destruction.  All he does is log roll and flail his body in to anything and gets anywhere he wants.  This week I have found him under the couch, under his dresser, under his bed, and he even log-rolled himself from the living room, around the couch, past the dining room table and into the kitchen.  He will roll over the dogs, his toys, his sister, and any thing else in his way. He did start "crawling" today, but his "crawl" is more of an air-hump, so I'll wait to post until it's a real crawl, so the FBI won't show up over here to confiscate my computer.

Addison has mastered sitting up.  She can sit-up as long as she wants no. She just sits and studies everything that is going on.  Much more low-key than Captain Destruction. She's like her mom...sitting, watching, observing and judging her male counterpart. 

Tyler and Addison have been given the OK to eat anything they can handle...so far we have added cauliflower(yuck), peas(meh), mango(yum), chicken(yum).  The change in texture really throws them(and their diaper consistency) off at first, but they handle if very well.  I'm thinking about really getting them into the whole American obesity thing at an early age, I just can't figure out if I should blender up and animal style In and Out Burger, a Tony's calzone, or monster plate of chicken nachos.  

I'm not really sure the doc meant Tyler could eat a plastic bowl when he said "anything they can handle" but he tried...

  

Jump Around. Jump Around.

I posted this on Facebook, but it's to hilarious not to share on the blog too.



I literally could have gotten 10 videos of them doing this.  They would just casually bounce until the music started...then it was party time! And no, Tyler is not naked, he just barfs on his clothes when he "Jumps Around" so we put him in the diaper only.

Parfing...I'll Explain

I think it has been pretty well documented that Tyler is the human body fluid volcano ...fluid is usually erupting from him most of the day...it ranges from spit-up to barf to pee to explosive diapers.  He's a boy, and apparently thats what boys do.

This weekend Nana and Papa(Caroline's folks) came into town for a few days.  Nana is usually pretty smart about putting on her haz-mat uniform if she is feeding Tyler...but I think she got a little too comfortable with him towards the end of the trip.  We were letting the babies "air out"(squirm around on the floor completely naked) before bath time when Nana got the Parf Treatment.  Parf Treatment, you ask? Ah yes...it's the baby version of a shart. It's a pee barf combo.   We were just playing with them on the floor and Nana decided she wanted to pick Tyler up...naked...bad idea.  He looks at her, gives her his adoring smile, points the "snake" in her direction, and lets it flow.  She tells me, "I need a rag", and not a second later does he open up his barf valve and hit the exact same spot he just pee soaked with some warm, regurgitated formula.  I'm talking sniper like precision.  The first thing that came to her mind was, "get me a rag" the first thing that came to my mind was, "blog".  So Nana sat there for a few extra seconds while I scrambled to get the iPhone...

I present to you...."Parfing"

In other baby news, Pops and I decided to baby proof all of the cabinets(huge freaking beating).  Tyler wanted to hang out with the men and watch us do some work.  I think he was extremely unimpressed....I looked over and he was literally passed-out, snoring in the bouncy-chair-hanging-thing...

Also, this link is full of pics that I put on Facebook. You don't have to have Facebook to access it, and I put mostly cute pictures on there because I want everyone to tell me how cute and awesome my babies are over and over again, not really, well sort of.  

REALLY CUTE PICTURES OF TYLER AND ADDISON HERE

Iron Chef-Baby Style

Caroline and I had decided before the babies arrived that we were going to try to make our own baby food. Our initial foods were sweet potatoes, pears, and carrots. 

We sliced and diced.







 

We steamed.

We burnt(I would suggest ommitting this step)

We got out every high powered kitchen gadget we owned, and even borrowed one too. 

The one on the left is the Beaba BabyCook Baby Food Maker.

The one in the center is the Vitamax Juicer/Blender.(This thing is a blender powered by a jet engine)

The one on the right is the Cuisanart Food Processor

We made stuff into mush.

 We froze said mush.  

And...voila.  1 oz. baby food servings.



Oh yeah...we drank too.

We Have a Diva On Our Hands...

It's true...Addison is a diva.  We've been suspecting it for a while, but it became official last week.  Addison has always been the toughest one to feed.  She always writhes around, gags herself on the bottle, just wasn't fun to be around during feeding time with Caroline and I.  Typically when we were feeding her she would eat about 3 oz. to 6 oz. per feeding. (Tyler was chugging 8 in each setting)  We asked Alem(nanny) if she would have problems feeding her and she always said, No, and often said Addison would beat Tyler.  Hold up, what?  Beat the Sultan of Slug? NO. WAY.

So I decided to go on a recon mission.  I was working from home a week ago, and decided to step in on a feeding to see how Alem was doing it. And I must admit..it is quite a set up.   

Addison is strapped in the Nap Nanny, blanket wrapped around her, burp cloth propping up the bottle, and no one can touch her. You think, I'm kidding...I'm not.  We did this all weekend and she beat the Chug Master every time.   I'm not sure what it is about her not being held, or the bottle not being held...but it works.  I'm also not sure how Alem discovered this feeding method, but my guess is she possesses nanny-super powers.  

This puts her in Diva category right? Feed me how I want to be fed, or I won't eat.  I'm sure this will eventually turn into, "Daddy, buy me those clothes or I won't wear any" or "Daddy, buy me this car or I'll get a ride with the older boys"

Which clothes do you want, and name the color of the car. 

 Im. Screwed. 

Text From an Old Fart?

I received a text from my dad this morning, and all it had was this picture.  

Study says kids at lower risk of injury if grandparent is driving



My first inclination was, "OK, he wants the babies to be safe and feels he should chauffeur them around at all times"  Cool, where's the dotted line, I'm in.  But then as I actually read the article, I think he was sending more of a subtle message.  The last line in the article has a quote from the professor that did the study and it reads: "Grandparents today are not that old, and don't fit the image of an impaired older driver," he said. "None of us should represent grandparents as kind of hobbling to the car on a walker." I get it, he doesn't want to be portrayed as the Old Geezer grandpa. Other than his really gray hair, his ownership of roughly 1,000 pair of reading glasses, and the fact that he still "takes" the newspaper...I don't really think of him as the OG(Old Geezer). 

It got me thinking, my dad is hip in some ways I never thought he would be...He has an iPhone(although sometimes he is seriously user challenged), plays Words With Friends(I beat him more than he beats me), he texts(sometimes it takes him hours to respond), and more often than not uses LOL, GR8, and OMG.(Although I did have to explain to him what LMFAO meant)  The man is on Twitter.(Twit handle is @heazle but he only tweets to people on The Ticket and SteveMartin so don't expect any riveting/life changing tweets.) And he reads my blog. (But he is still convinced the only way he can to get to it is through my Twitter profile and "can't find it on Google") 

So Pops, whenever you're ready 2 retire and become full time chauffeur, text me, tweet me, or leave me a comment on the blog, because I've got 2 car seats ready 4 U.  The only thing is, the pay isn't GR8. LOL.  

Dual Feeding Wednesday

Mornings are typically easy around the house.  Baby's up at 6:45, feeding completed by 7:15 and Caroline's out the door, Wonder Pets until 7:35(note, Wonder Pets has the most addicting theme song yet, and they sing it at least 3 times in a 25 minute episode), play time on the floor until 8:00, down for nap, then shower time for me, nanny arrives at 8:45.  Sometimes those 2 hours pass like 15 minutes, others they pass like days. 
Today. Was. Rough.

Caroline had to be out the door at 6:30, which means I was all by my lonesome for this morning's events.  Out with the man-to-man defense, in with the Zone-Defense...and I forgot to make coffee.  Epic fail. 

Dual feedings are not my favorite and I try to avoid them at all costs(I can usually barter my way out by offering a nights sleep monitor-less in the guest room, not this time, as work called for C)  Dual feedings usually end with spit-up all over me or the couch(usually both), pissed off babies(usually both), and me threatening to punt a dog over the back fence(usually both).  I'll say it, Caroline won't, dual feedings suck.

So here we go, 6:35 and right on cue, both babies begin their morning talking.  They first part of the morning is usually my favorite, both babies are smiling, talking, and just really happy.  Change diapers, which were really full of pee this morning(too much info?), jammies back on, strapped into Nap Nannies, bottles made, and I take my reserved seat in the middle of both of them, shove the bottles in...and we're off. 

Dual Feedings typically require cooperation from one baby.  If one baby cooperates, you can usually fend off the other screamer for a few minutes.  Well this morning, Captain Cooperative(Tyler), turned into Captain I Want To Make Daddy Miserable...

About 15 seconds into it, I can hear Captain I Want To Make Daddy Miserable pooping. Tyler loves to eat, and usually nothing stands in between him and bottle chugging.  Well today, the Captain decided his explosion was going to stand in the way of it.  Only dilemma, Addison is not the easiest of feeders, and she was on a roll.  (My quick math shows that in 5 months they've been on this earth, we've fed them roughly 2,200 bottles, and he has never lost to her, ever.  He's like the Babe Ruth of bottles) Of course, she was ahead of him at the halfway point, and I'm in it to win it with her. Then she poops. And let me tell you, at 5 months, if there is one thing I know about my baby girl, it's that poop in diaper = stop everything and change me or I will scream until I'm clean.  To give you a time stamp, it's already way beyond Wonder Pets time.  I have to change them both now, and, of course, both poops were type that Haz-Mat uniforms could have/should have been worn. Diapers changed, feeding re-started, and by the time it was all said and done...spit up was everywhere, babies were pissed off babies, but luckily the dogs were still on our side of the fence...and it was nap time.

 

Bathing-Pt Deux

Well, we happened upon one of the greater bathing inventions of all time. The Safety 1st Bath Chair And luckily for us, this device requires little parent assistance, less space than the swim rafts, and absolutely zero adult entry into the tub! 

This is the last 30 seconds of an Addison Giggle-fest that went on for about 3 or 4 minutes. We would squirt her with the bath toy and she loved it. Shocking I know, but bathing hands free/adult free can be a little more entertaining for the kids.

I'm still convinced that Daisy wants to be a baby, or at least get the attention of the babies...further proof.

Yes, those are paw prints at the bottom of the tub. I saw these when we came into clean up. I'm pretty sure if I would have caught her in there, she would have been sitting upright in the bath chair waiting for her turn to to be scrubbed down.

PS-we also tried the Bumbo Seat as a bathing apparatus...no dice. At first you can suction it to the bottom and it works great, but just as they get comfortable in it, the suction loosens, and the Bumbo turns into an inner tube ride. Tyler no likey.

Randomness on: Bathing, Feeding, and Messes

I don't really know where to begin with this blog, or know where it's going to go...but I do know to tell you this is how each and every night begins and ends in our house.

NOTE:If you want the Cliff's Notes version of this blog, scroll to the bottom. This blog takes the scenic route to get where I'm going, if in fact there is a defined destination.

Tyler and Addison have started "eating"(very loosely used term) solid foods. They started at 4 months with rice cereal, not to be confused with Rice Krispies, as one of our less kid experienced friends amused us with. The following week they moved onto oatmeal cereal, and this week we started with bananas. Next week avocados. Basically the mess increase each week too...The mess on them, the mess on the bibs, the mess on the table...and yes even the mess in the diapers.

This picture is a couple of minutes into the banana feeding...Tyler has already ditched the bib and shirt(It's a lot easier to clean up regurgitated banana off of bare skin as opposed to a cotton bib)

Caroline and I decide to try out the high chairs for the first time, in the middle of the feeding. The kiddos seem to like them, but the mess on Addison's face appears to show she has given up on swallowing the bananas and really likes spitting them out. After about 15 minutes of attempting to shovel spoonfuls of mush into their mouths, solid food training is over and it's time for baths to wash off previously mentioned regurgitated bananas from each child.

This is what the kitchen looked like last night when we were done. Notice the two bibs that were discarded under the table. When I came into take this picture, the dogs were molesting these bibs with their tongues, proving their love for regurgitated bananas.

I need to sidetrack this blog for a moment to help explain the next pictures and the evolution of our new bathing techniques.

A couple of weeks ago we decided that the kids were too big for sink baths and it was time to move onto bath tub baths. Caroline and I wanted the babies to bathe together to make it like play time. We each decided we would get on our knees, lean over the tub, each holding a baby and proceed with bathing. The only problem with that is we are each holding a baby with both of our hands and we have no way to scrub them. As we are both leaned over, and wondering how in the hell we are going to clean these babies, Caroline quickly looks at me and says "Take your clothes off and get in" my response is, "I'm not getting in the tub naked with the babies" (Normally, If Caroline tells me to, "take your clothes off and get in", I'm in, no questions asked, but this was a different circumstance). So I grab a pair of gym shorts and hop in the tub with Tyler, she still leaning over holding Addison. By me jumping in, it didn't really free any hands up so I look at her and say, "You're going to have to take your clothes off and get in too"(In all fairness, if I tell Caroline to "Take her clothes of and get in" she usually declines due to a stomach ache or is too tired) So, she finds her nearest bathing suit and hops in. So in a span of 3 minutes we went from bathing the babies in the tub for play time to all four of us, crammed in our small tub bathing babies. Caroline has the faucet in her back, Tyler is peeing all over the place, and we don't have towels. Needless to say...bath tub bath #1 was a complete failure. Going forward we decided to use to pool floats we got as mini bath tubs inside the bath tub...whatever you want to call it, it works, and we don't have to get in.

Back to blog:

This the remnants of bath time after we clean off banana and oatmeal each and every night. I went to shower and tried every which way to shower with those floats in there, but it just wasn't happening. And this is how we end our evenings now...Two VERY adult beverages.

CLIFF'S NOTE VERSION

(OR THE BEGINNING OF MY CHILDREN'S PICTURE BOOK CAREER

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This might be the most rambling, random, incoherent blog I've ever written.

Which One Isn't Like the Other?

We have two dogs who we love. They used to be the object of our affection...key word in that sentence is "used". Daisy and Saidy know they have fallen a rung or two on the love ladder...their OK with it. They love the babies. If a baby is crying Saidy is the first one up to check on them, and usually sitting by their door until we get there, tail wagging. They give the babies kisses and are typically respectful of their space. Daisy's first trick started during baby feedings. She'll lay on the floor, and act non-interested but as soon as a baby burps, she hops up, anticipating "something" to clean up as a nice little snack.

Her newest trick happened this week. I can honestly tell you, she did this herself, and I had nothing to do with this pose. I think it proves she is smart...and needs some attention.
I think I will start worrying when Daisy only drinks out of bottles and starts wearing diapers around.

D-Day(or Father's Day)

After my little Mother's Day "slip up", I was hoping Father's Day would come and go without a mention...but I knew that wasn't going to happen. Father's Day turned into Father's Weekend, and am pretty sure(around 35% sure) that Caroline wasn't doing it to remind me of how I overlooked Mother's Day, but to show me how awesome I am at being a father.

Highlighted timeline of my weekend:

Friday Night-NyQuil + no baby monitors + no dogs + guest bedroom solo-(The NyQuil was necessary as I was beginning to feel a bit sick, and even though the babies are sleeping through the night the monitors aren't as distracting, but the listed combination is a recipe for a very solid sleeping night...which has been pretty sporadic over the last few months, and in turn, is very appreciated)

Saturday Morning-Caroline woke me with gift bags and babies in both arms. The babies, because of their limited work experience and limited budget, got me a trophy and coffee mug that said, "World's Best Dad" on them. Tyler got me a card that mentioned farting noises and pull my finger(the kid is already in love with farting noises), and Addison got me a sweet card that was no nonsense and all love. (She's a sweetie) Caroline helped supplement the babies budget with the coolest gift...She had a book printed with tons of pics and stories that highlighted my first 4 months as a dad.

*Note- Each time I open a gift or read a card...the Mother's Day wound opens a bit more and burns a bit deeper. I'm sure (about 35%) that this was not Caroline's intention, but it was always in the back of my mind.

Saturday Mid-Day - Caroline gave me her gift...which was a pool. Well, we rented a pool for the Summer, but what an awesome gift. Because we still can't decide if we want to move, or have a pool when we do move, we just rented one for the next few months, to stay out of the heat and have something to do, and to make sure Tyler isn't allergic to water.

*Dagger getting deeper...burning

I think the kiddos liked it though...

Saturday Evening-I got to nap after the margaritas...er, I mean after the pool. And it was a real nap...in bed, doors shut, fan on high...

Sunday-My Dad and Unc T(Ty) came out and we all went to brunch, came home, played with babies, and I napped all day. (I was honestly sick all day, and each time a coughed or sneezed I thought about how I might have made a deal with the devil for under-celebrating Mother's Day #1, and this was going to be my punishment each and every Father's Day from here on out...)

Sunday Night-Another date with NyQuil and the guest room.

Needless to say, after all of the sleeping, cards, gifts, and celebrating...Father's Day #1 was great.

I'm still sure (about 35%) that Caroline was doing it out of love.

Women Start Early

We all know that women like to talk, but I had no idea that it started so early. This is what Addison does most of the day now. She even woke up at 3:00 am just to talk, talked like this for 15 minutes, and then talked herself to sleep...If that doesn't say "woman" I don't know what does.

Highlights of the video:

Watching her tongue(She knows it's there, but can't quite figure out what to do with it)

Watching Tyler towards the end(sleeping right through it)

Addison picking up her pitch level at the end, and showing no signs of slowing down.

PS-You might not enjoy this video as much as me, but I've watched it a few times. It cracks me up.

Mastering the Silent Celebration

With the recent success of the Mavs coupled with the fact that the bambinos are in bed just before tip off, 7:30 pm, I have had to really temper my frustration/excitement at the TV. If you've ever watched a gamed with me, you know that I yell at the TV, mostly profanities and I often have the tendency to get off my couch and do celebratory dances when something goes right.

With the risk of waking up the kids or my wife for that matter, I have mastered the art of Silent Celebration. Silent Celebration can be described as yelling without yelling. I still fist pump the air, I still do my dances, I still celebrate...I just fake yell. Yes, mouth still open, mouthing words, and fake screaming...just no sound comes out. It's tough to do, and even tougher to master...but you no what they say, "Never wake a sleeping baby" My only question is, is it ok to wake a sleeping baby if Dirk nails a game winner?

Memorial Day Catch Up

Memorial Day took us down to Galveston, with the Jaggards who also have Campbell, who was born 3 days before the twins. It's pretty funny to see them all together, and all the stuff that goes along with traveling with 3 youngsters. A trip that used to require 1 Tahoe, a cooler, a couple of cases of beer, and some swimsuits. Now includes 2 Tahoes each stuffed with strollers, boxes of diapers, canisters of formula, 3 pack-n-plays, tons of luggage, numerous baby seats and swings, and, of course, we still make room for the coolers and beer. I was talking to my brother before we left, and he asked who is going just the 4 of y'all, thinking Griff, Jess, Caroline and I, I responded yes, then quickly remembered that 4 had turned into 7 in what seemed like overnight...Now the party has added its own mini wolf pack of Tyler, Addison, and Campbell. Another funny part of traveling with all of these youngsters is watching people's faces as you pass them. They inadvertently stare at you and then the babies and then back at you...it's as if the are calculating in their heads, "let's see two sets of parents, three babies, carry the one, niner" and then they brain overload. We were asked several times if they were triplets, and we got very good at our newly rehearsed response, "Nope, twins and a best friend"

Tyler sporting his new pineapple "swim" trunks. I quote swim because Tyler hates water. He hates bathing, he hates wet wash cloths, he hates everything associated with being wet. He was in the water for about 3 seconds before we can add "he hates swimming" to the list too. And if pattern holds we will be able to add, "he hates baptism" after this Sunday.

Addison rocking her new bikini. I would like to set the record straight, I am not an advocate of my daughter being in a bikini on the Internet...but I'm hoping this is the only bikini picture of her ever posted to the web...PS doesn't my wife look hot for having twins 3 1/2 months ago? She asked me not to post this pic, but I couldn't resist.

Tyler is getting good at holding his own bottle. My theory is he gets pissed when we pull the bottle out to burp him, so he takes matters into his own hands and feeds himself. The dude loves to eat.

Tyler and Addison were pooped after the long day the the pool.

We're the Three Best Friends
That Anyone Could Have
We're the Three Best Friends
That Anyone Could Have

We're the Three Best Friends
That Anyone Could Have
And We'll Never ever ever ever
Leave Each Other

We're the Three Best Friends
That Anyone Could Have
We're the Three Best Friends
That Anyone Could Have

Take Cover

Nothing like a tornado warning and some hail to get your blood flowing on a Tuesday night.

We heard the sirens go off around 8:00, which is right in the middle of feeding time for the bambinos. As we are trying to cram bottles down throats, I keep hearing the path of the storm...and it seems to be headed our direction. Luckily, the technology we have today gives us on ETA on the storm time. We had 28 minutes to finish feeding and take cover. Typically, Tyler can chug an 8 oz bottle in about 9 minutes. Chugging is a great skill of his, like father like son. Addison on the other hand takes her sweet time and usually can get an 8 ounce bottle down in about 45 minutes. Much to Dad's liking, a sipper not a chugger. Knowing that the storm is going to hit about mid-feed, we devise a shelter plan in our head. Bathtub is to close to a window, plus trying to feed two babies, shelter two dogs, and house the lucky parent who gets to seek shelter with them seems like it could get a little over crowded. So we chose the hallway....The initial shelter consisted of strapping both babies in the Nap Nannies, grabbing the dogs, shutting the doors, and trying to limit the screaming by continuing the feeding.

As the storm intensified and I kept hearing louder clanging of hail, I decided we needed more protection...So I grabbed a mattress and protected everyone, and left myself on the outside to go down with the ship...

A sneak peek deep inside our storm shelter...The dogs appear to be more protected than the babies...

Luckily, all we got was some hail, strong wind, and a blog post.

How Not to Handle Baby Mama's 1st Mothers Day

The gift for Mother's Day #1 should be special, something to remember, something that should be cherished, and definitely not something that is forgotten.

Bring in public enemy number one...yours truly...this guy.

I'll take you back to two weeks ago we were shopping and Caroline saw a lady wearing these fancy Nike tops, and commented on how she really liked them. So, as any good husband would do, I filed that in the "next gift for Caroline" brain folder. A couple of days later, Mother's Day gifts got brought up and I mentioned that I was good on a gift, and I swear to you, she looks directly at me and speaks these words to me, "You're not getting me those stupid running tops I commented on last week are you?" Me, "Uh, I was going to." Her, "I knew as soon as I said that, they would be my next gift, those are not appropriate for Mother's Day" CRAP!

Now we have moved on to the Thursday before Mother's Day. Caroline hinted at wanting these for Mother's Day. Which I still contest is just as ridiculous as the Nike tops, but whatever. I stared at my computer for about 3 hours that day and could not bring myself to mouse click "complete purchase" on the $200 pair of black shoes. A pair of black shoes that are very similar to black shoes that can be bought at Target for $20, a very similar pair of black shoes that I have seen the dogs use as a chew toy in previous shoe gifts...I just couldn't spend $200 on some black shoes. Sue me.

That brings us to Friday, which means we are leaving town, and I still have no gift. At this point I have written this off to the "This is not going to go over well on Sunday, hopefully she will not expect a gift" category. WRONG.

Sunday comes and goes without a gift...or a card. Monday comes and goes...no gift...no card...but a mention from Caroline about not getting a card or a gift, and a text from one of her friends who I consulted with about said gift saying, "What did you end up getting Caroline for Mother's Day?" Needless to say, I didn't respond. Tuesday morning comes and I wake up and think, "Wow, I am an ass." Anxiety about the gift sets in, probably a few days too late, but at least it set in, and I am in pure panic/scramble mode.

I've always been told nothing says I'm sorry and I love you quite like this. So to anyone reading this, I beg of you...please...The next time you see my wife, please comment on her lovely necklace with the T & A charms on it...even if she isn't wearing it, pretend she is. And to all you dudes about to become Dads out there...don't forget, don't ever forget Mother's Day # 1.

My only excuse about the gift is, Tyler and Addison thought I was taking care of the gift, I thought they were taking care of the gift, basically it was just a lack of communication on our part.

Flying, Mother's Day Weekend, and Mexican Traditions

Yes, yes, yes, I know, I've been in a bit of a blog rut. A so called slump, but put two 11 week old babies on an airplane to Nana and Papa's near the Mexican border, and you've instantly got some blog material. I'm going to combine our whole trip into on blog, so it may be lengthy....here goes

Flying: Every trip begins with packing, but packing for infants is tough. Not only do you have to pack for your stay, but you have to pack for the flight. Things like formula, pacifiers, extra outfits for parents and babies in case of explosions...all kinds of stuff I never thought of. First off, you've got to figure how your going to get a stroller, two car seats, two babies, yourselves, and your luggage all through security without pissing off the entire line of patrons around you. Plus, it wouldn't be a true test unless one of your children has a blowout in the middle of the line(Addison 1, Mom and Dad 0). Good news, the nice security lady at the airport let us bypass the "regular people" line and go straight through security, not sure if this is customary with children, but it was nice. Bad news, as we skip the line, we realize how many people are glaring, and the cartoon bubbles above their head appear to be saying, "I hope to hell they are not on my flight." As we approach the scanners and metal detectors, the security lady starts giving us some instructions...and she could tell we were horribly flustered. So she took care of us....next thing I see are her arms in the air, and she shouts, "Everyone stop, I'm getting this group through and you'll just have to wait" Oh man...people hate us, I start sweating, Caroline just ducks her head. "You" pointing at Caroline, "Grab both babies, and get them through the metal detectors. Dad will get everything else" ...Uh...everything else like the stroller, the car seats, the luggage, the two pacifiers I am now carrying in my mouth(Yes, i was out of hands and that felt like the appropriate place for them). I mean we literally shut down the security gate at terminal C for 5-7 minutes.

Luckily, the poo bomb in Addison's diaper didn't set off the alarms. Our flight had empty seats, so we were allowed to take the car seat carriers on the plane and keep the babies in them, except for the feeding at take off which we were told is a must to help the babies clear their ears.

Mother's Day Weekend
It was a great weekend in McAllen with Caroline's parents. It also nice that they don't get to see the babies that much, and they want to spend as much time with them as possible...including middle of the night feedings and exploding diaper changes. Caroline and I slept through the night for two straight nights and even went out to dinner. It was pretty awesome.

Mexican Traditions
Background:
For those of you who don't know, McAllen is a border town, meaning it is basically Mexico, and Mexican traditions are in full affect. I have recently become a germ freak with the babies and want anyone that is handling them to wash their hands prior to "petting" them.

We all went to brunch Sunday for Mother's Day, and as we are waiting for our table this older Mexican lady comes by, admires the twins, says something in Spanish about them and then walks over to Tyler, looks at him and then gives him a full on two handed face massage with her recently un-washed, un-sanitized hands. I'm fighting the urge to slap her hand away, Caroline is looking at me and knows how uncomfortable it makes me. She finally quit rubbing her grimy hands all over him, and my heart rate subsided. I thought she was done, but one look at Addison and she gives her the same 30 second double face massage treatment. At this point there is nothing I can do....After she quit I felt like I should have given her a tip for her masseuse duties.

Anyway, I guess the Mexican tradition is to touch the face of babies is good luck...Thank God, a lot of people weren't looking to get lucky that day. Maybe they should add washing hands to that tradition.

Fun With Easter...and Easter Hats

Easter was our first holiday as a foursome, and I learned a lot on Easter Sunday that I will need to know for future holidays.

Things I learned...

It is impossible to get 1 kid, let alone 2 kids to stare at the camera at the same time...so as you will see, most of our pictures will have a baby with a hand in their face, eyes closed, weird look on their face, or crying....and these are the edited pictures, I've already deleted 500 pics of each shot to find these.

You can dress kids up on holidays...they are fair game, especially at this age. Uncle Ty bought them Bunny Ear Hats. Tyler will sure regret his solo picture come graduation or wedding time, but I think it is hilarious.

A 10 pound baby turns into a 50 pound baby 30 minutes into a church service. We were sore...and sweating midway through the service....maybe we need to eggsercise more.

All in all, the 1st Easter was a hopping success. I wouldn't have wanted to spend it with anybunny else, I'm not yolking around.

Alright, I'm eggsiting stage left....